a perfectly good heart broken in two :(

We were in love, so irrevocably in love (at least that was what I thought!). it all started with the same old clichéd story of girl having crush on a guy at school, they hang out, get close, talk almost 24/7 and before they know fall deeply for each other. I started liking him to an extent that without him, I thought, there was no way of ever being happy. I had forgotten the days of single hood, the fresh feeling of having to just think about yourself, to decide on plans that YOU want to do. Love with this guy was so much that the once cherished best friends had become best friends just for the name’s sake, because I had no idea of whereabouts of them at all, had no clue of what was happening in their life, I was too busy making plans and hanging out with my prince charming. Never did it occur to me of separating time for them. Aah…now that I think about it, I didn't even have time for myself! My day started with texting him “good morning” and ended with his “goodnight” and “I love you”. Not a care of what was going on around this planet, or of what was happening in the next room with my parents, my only work/job/hobby…whatever it could be, was just him! I was already started to dream about our 'happily ever after.'

But fate had something else stored for me, which I realized, of course very late! The whole world was screaming out about the unfaithfulness of him, but me… I had become deaf. But thankfully (of course, it had some cost), I WASN’T blind, so I clearly saw the worst nightmare of my life happening right in front of me! And since I was one of those ‘wont-show-my-weakness’ kinda girl, I acted out  real cool in front of everyone, others seemed to look worried but I was okay, talking out like as if it was nothing. I in fact consoled and asked them to not think about my sad life anymore! Weird huh…but, that’s exactly what I did all the while. I wore this mask everywhere I went, with everyone I met. Only when I was alone, when it was night, this mask disappeared.  All the words coming out from other people and the things done by him would then flash on my mind in a slow motion, every minute detail standing out sharply one after another. Tears would then well up my eyes, fall down like tiny streams of river and would go on and on. So soaked up pillow, swollen eyes, and painful nightmares, flash back of all the sweet as well the bitter memories had become a daily routine- not a single day ended without having gone through all of these.

Shocking as hell, he was actually having a good time! Here I was, weeping and crying a river and he was uploading pictures, smiling with that chick around his arms, confessing that HE WAS IN LOVE WITH HER! That came as a big bad blow to me, because deep inside I still had that belief that he was innocent and that he’d come back to me. I had seen his betrayal clearly through others before, but I tried hard to be blind until this happened. I dint know what to do, how to react, whom to share. My whole life was falling apart, the only thing I held close was the one who never thought the same about me and was so quick to start up with another one. 


This realization cut me deep; the once perfectly good heart was torn in two. When he came to my life, I gave my world to him, and when he left he took that away, he took the best of me, leaving a sad, depressed girl behind. I stood there still loving him, and he didn't think twice about leaving me! The wound may heal, but scar that he made inside me, will remain forever, and will always remind me of how I’d wasted precious years of my life loving a gutter’s stone. yuck!!!!!